Tuesday, 10 April 2012

What A Lovely Easter :)

I realised that my previous blogs have all been a bit "typical woman", emotional and moany. So I decided that this blog will show my sensitive lovey dovey side, which believe it or not is just as big as my angry side. Yes, yes, I admit it, I am a big mushy love bug on the inside *embarrased face* ( those who are aware of our college jokes will appreciate this reference). So, in this blog I will be telling you about my Easter, and you may not care...but I'm gunna tell you anyway...Mwaahhhhaaaahhhhaaa :) ! My Easter was one of the best I've ever had - not only did I spend it with people I love, I got some lovely gifts too. The day started really nicely, I woke up to the sound of my Mum coming in my room to wish me a Happy Easter, which was lovely in itself but also gave me a massive advantage. You see.. I had bought my Mum and Step Dad little Easter presents (lindt bunnies) wrapped them, and put little messages on them from the "Easter Bunny"... and I wanted to place them downstairs so they could find them. So, while my Mum was in the shower and my Step Dad was still in bed I snuck downstairs and put them on the sofa in the places where they sit. This worried me a little because I thought they might not see them and plant their bums on them and crush them...but i hoped that neither of them were that blind :P. My question was answered soon after I heard their footsteps going downstairs as they both burst into my room with their Easter presents for me, a big lindt bunny from my Step Dad and a little package from my Mum. I opened it to find this lovely teddy bear necklace, which you can attach little paw print charms to, it was so lovely when I got dressed I put in on straight away. I still haven't opened my lindt bunny because I want to save it :)... I bet everyone else is in that situation too.
After I had got ready, I was soon on my way round to my boyfriend's house, Jamie. <3 Now...how to describe Jamie...probably the most talented boy I have ever met, a brilliant wit, gorgeous in every way and has the singing voice of an angel. And he's all mine :), which I am incredibly happy about as I am head over heels in love with him. Many girls can try and get him, but believe me they don't have a chance, he's stuck with me :).
Anyway back to my Easter, me and jamie had planned to meet at his, exchange presents, spend the day snuggling watching DVDs and stuffing our faces with pizza, and it was as good as it sounds :). I eagerly shoved DVDs in my bag (about 5 and we only watched one - Matilda - don't pretend you dont love that film too ;) ) and two apple and raspberry (the best flavour) J2Os ready to have with our pizza and legged it round there, his present also in my bag. If you knew Jamie as well as I do, you would know he gets obbsessed about a lot of things...some good :) and some really bad haha...and one of these would be lindt chocolate. So for Easter I had bought him a big lindt egg with loads of little lindt eggs :). And Me and Jamie also have the tradition of buying eachother lindt and ferrero rochers...I pretended I didnt know what I was getting even though Jamie told me the second he bought me the egg :). So, I put on my best "Oh, I had no idea" as we exchanged presents and thanked eachother. I also got him a card which I wrote an essay in about how much I love him. I didn't get a card back...wahhhhh :(. I'm trying not to be bitter. He will make it up to me :). We then watched Matilda...while beating eachother with his sofa cushions and tickling eachother until we couldn't breathe :)...thats normal for us.  We then ordered two medium pizzas - margherita for me and meat feast for Jamie, with a side of wedges for me and BBQ Chicken wings for Jamie. The fun was watching him eat them, as he manages to get BBQ sauce everywhere!! It is the cutest thing ever :). We were so stuffed, we slumped down on the sofa, only to find the best film on TV....Jurrasic Park!!! Now it says in my info I am obssessed with dinosaurs...this is true. Me and jamie play dinosaurs...this is also true. My college and tutor have been blessed by seeing us play. They were all in stitches as you can imagine. :). Then me and jamie played hide and seek. This consisted of me running upstairs locking myself in the bathroom and not letting Jamie in :), then we played on Jamie's PS2 racing game :) and I beat him!!! mwhahaha! then we had lots and lots of... snuggles :D !!!!. I knew what some of you were thinking...you sick bastards ;).
So you got it, me and Jamie are completely in love, and the best of little kids when we're together :) we have a lot of fun, a lot of laughs, get through the bad and good together, and make eachother really really happy :).
So there's my easter :). It was amazing and I hope all you had fabulous easters too. Tune in tomorrow for my new topic - a question that will cross everyones mind at least one in their lives - "would you change gender for a day given the opportunity?". "Hmmm, what would it be like to have a penis?" Tune in tomorrow kids!! Toodles :) xxx

Wednesday, 4 April 2012

Mr Bus Driver...How Do You Sleep At Night?

Ok, so my rant today is quite a common one, but a good one none the less. For those of you who out there who travel on public transport reguarly, you will know exactly what I'm talking about. Picture this. You walk out of your favourite shop in Reading whether it be Paperchase, Waterstones or Ann Summers (those arent my favourite shops..What? ;) ) and it is peeing it down with rain. You peer at your watch...or a nearby clock..your mobile or ask a passer by who always, always, always seems to reply "time you got a watch". Well you know what smart arse?? I have a watch, and I can tell you exactly where it is on my bedside table, so that one didn't really work out for ya, did it? Anyway, you only have a couple of minutes till your bus,so you start speed walking it down the highstreet. Not always the best...for those of you who have a big bum like me and can't help but swing your hips when you walk will know exactly what I'm talking about...and those 40 year old perverts I mentioned in my blog yesterday always seem to be around at this point. So ignoring the odd whistle and "Damn Girl" (For those of you who know my friend Sophie Brigden..yes I did picture her in my mind when I wrote this :D ) and putting a look on your face that looks like you're abouto kill someone who gets in your way, you get to the corner of the road you need to catch your bus on...and low and behold...it's there. This is when you suddenly transform in to Usain Bolt and send old dear Grannies flying as you race to that bulbous red, green, orange, whatever colour, four wheeled transport that you need to get home. You see the last person step onto the bus, pay...you're only a few strides away...and...arghhh... the doors close. And your banging on that door, like it's your ex boyfriend's face, and you know that plump man behind the steering wheel can hear you but nope he's just going to pretend that your not there and drive off. Now this is that tense moment where everyone is staring at you as the bus passes you, your already drenched and looking like a drown rat, and you get all the "ti bois* on the top deck swearing at you, and you want to swear back but something holds you back. Maybe its holding on to that last bit of dignity you had or..its the fact that bus has stopped at the traffic lights and you'll be too embarrased. However, inside your head all the swear words in the sun are spinning around like a little kid on a merry go round, and you curse the day that man ever became a bus driver.
Does he have no concience? Or is he just blaming you for his lame career choice, because he was the ti boi*who sat in the back of class, mouthed back to the teacher, did no work, and started smoking before he even came out the womb. Whosat in exams and did nothing thinking he was so cool. Now he's blaming you because you put the work in and can afford to buy nice clothes and not have to stay all day and night in your work uniform, and are off to university to do something good with your life! ARGGHHHH.
So my advice to you. The next time you get screwed over by a bus driver and are left standing on the side of the road, take a moment to smile to yourself, because you will never end up being that much of a wanker.
I would just like to say, that no bus drivers were harmed in the making of this blog, and if any bus drivers are reading this... this is just a typical stereotype and in no way is meant to say you are a wanker...you may be a very nice bus driver... unless you have done exactly what I have just said in my blog in which case you are a massive wanker, and should man up and get over it.
*Oh and for those of you who have not been blessed with the presence of my gorgeous boyfriend jamie, ti boi is the name he has given to all those little chavvy kids who annoy the hell out of you and think they are all hard, and put picture of their completely untoned stomach on facebook and have the caption "look at my six pack".... uhhh what?? Ti boi is in fact short for batti boi so enjoy using that little peice of joyous vocablary.
Thankyou for reading and I will be back again with another rant about something that people really dont care about. Your, over emotional blogger, ThatsSoLisa. Toodles xxx

Tuesday, 3 April 2012

Loosing My Blogging Virginity ;)

Ok, so this is my first post and I have to admit I'm a little bit excited :P... I would start off with the usual so this is me and my life...but lets be honest who really cares? And you've probably had enough of that from my info, so i'm going to go straight ahead and rant. So my first rant will be about... drum role please... alcohol. Ok, ok, ok... I know what you may be thinking. I've come on to some weirdly religous girls profile who is going to rant about how much of a sin it is to drink alcohol. You couldn't be more wrong. I am an atheist.That is in no way an attempt to push my religous veiws on you... well not right now anyway :P. No, infact I will be talking about the effect that alcohol has on the older generation of men. I am talking about the single sad 40 year old perverts who sit there with sunglasses on when its raining, and peep over their 5 year old newspaper at you as you walk past. However, these men don't just come out when it's raining. Ohhhh no. They come out at night too, when alcohol happens to give them the confidence of a drop dead gorgeous 20 year old male with endless amounts of modeling contracts. I have happened to encounter 2 of them in the same night... and they are not fun. The other night, I was out with college friends and boyfriend celebrating my friend's 19th. And I was just stood by the table knocking back my J20 like it was alcohol and having a damn good time...until I here an "excuse me" behind me. Now I turn around with some cheshire cat smile on my face thinking I'm going to see a Jason Stathem (aww yeahhh ) look alike that finds me a little attrcative...but what I'm really confronted with is a sweaty stuttering man, who's had way too much, and his opening line being "look, i'm not hitting on you." Are you kidding me?! If any man, who is over the age of 30, comes over to you with that opening line... just walk away. Wish I could have taken my own advice...but no. Instead, I stood there...just stood there...said nothing..while this freaky old man was asking me to come over and wish his mate a happy 40th birthday. "What? Do I look like some woman of the red light district who you pay for anything you fancy. No. (And I really didn't because I live by the rule if you have your legs out, dont have your tits out sorta thing. I was just in a nice dress :) and if you happen to have me on fb you will see it). So what makes you think I'm going to come over and do that for you? You disrepectful, disgusting old man".... Now this is what I was thinking. Wish I could have said it, but no I just stood there like a brain damaged idiot. Luckily, I had my goreous friends Kathy and Sophie to save me, and he quickly disappeared, and I didn't see him for the rest of the night. But that was not the end. As me and Kathy were taking one of our many trips to the bathroom that night, talking about the creepy previous event, another dude with way to much confidence for the state that was himself comes up to me and asks the same bloody question!!!! I mean, come on.... but did I learn from the last time? Nope. My brain damage returned and I stood there. Luckily Kathy got all agro, and he soon cleared off. But my god. Why do guys, when they've had a little bit of alcohol, think that evey girl is some kind of trophy for them to swoon over and cart about like a prize? It seriously bewilders me. I mean have a little respect. We are human beings, not iced buns in a window to be drooled over. And we do not appreciate old men looking at us like we're their roast dinner on a Sunday. Old men should be banned from drinking alcohol if they are going to use the confidence to hit on a girl who is just about old enough to be their grand-daughter. It's sick, disturbing and I have to say has given me night mares about turning into a caramel slice and being bought by an old man who has to take his teeth out to eat me!!! AARRRGGHHH :'( !
Later that night, when I was safely away from the creeps, me and Kathy came up with the best solution for all you bloggers out there who are unlucky enough to come across the overly confident drunk old man. The face. For those of you who don't know what we are talking about, get on youtube and watch Jenna Marbles The Face!! It seriously will save your life.
Thats my rant for today over with :). Tune in  for another pretty damn soon as I'm am overly emotional female who gets upset and angry alot...so expect great things from me ;). Toodles xx