Why I chose to go Vegan.

**Disclaimer: This is a personal choice due to my beliefs and research I have accumulated over time. In no way is this a judgement on people who are not vegetarian or vegan - you do you. I just wanted to share my personal journey and the research that has helped me towards my decision. My decision has not effected anyone around me. My partner and family have not gone vegan just because I have - again, this was a personal choice. I did this for me.**

It has always been a curiosity of mine to see how a diet change would effect the way I feel on a daily basis. I have recently been diagnosed as gluten and dairy intolerant - so you can imagine that most of my life has been a bloaty, ill and ,sometimes extremely, painful mess. You would think I would have blamed the food I was eating faster, but due to suffering from anxiety, it was easily blamed as the cause. That was until I was finally able to seek the help of a dietitian, who gave me a full diagnosis and helped me along the way to feeling a little better. However I still wasn't entirely happy with the food I was eating.

I was vegetarian for 9 years of my life, and for a while it has been something I have wanted to return to. Due to being vegetarian from birth, my body cannot break down meats such as lamb, pork or duck - they make me very ill. Part of my anxiety is caused by food preparation - especially when it comes to meat. I will not go into detail of "why" right now, but for hours after consuming meat I'm constantly thinking about what I've just eaten and whether it was cooked properly. This worry consumes my daily life and exhausts me.

Since beginning to research in detail vegetarianism and veganism, I also found myself wondering if the meat I was eating had been ethically sourced. I have always been a lover of animals, and from a very young age have cared for several pets. Animals have no way of voicing how they are feeling other than changing their behavior. They cannot just tell you they feel unwell, or are in pain, or that they just know something is wrong and need to go to the vet. The thought an animal is suffering with no way of voicing their pain, and is being put in that uncomfortable situation to contribute to consumer items that humans don't really need, stirs up such anger and upset in me that it is hard to explain. Food is not the only thing animals are exploited and used for. The cosmetic industry has not escaped my research, and neither has fashion - these will be covered in future blogs. Yes there are of course different ways to source meat, but for me, not being able to prove that meat or eggs came from an ethical source is enough to put me off.

And it is not just the animals that benefit from humans choosing to live a vegetarian or vegan life. Planet Earth does also. Global Warming can no longer be denied, and everyone should start thinking about their carbon footprint... veganism and vegetarianism can help reduce yours. In order for an animal to reach your plate it takes land, fuel, water - a tonne of waste.

"If we really want to reduce the human impact on the environment, the simplest and cheapest thing anyone can do is to eat less meat. Behind most of the joints of beef or chicken on our plates is a phenomenally wasteful, land- and energy-hungry system of farming that devastates forests, pollutes oceans, rivers, seas and air, depends on oil and coal, and is significantly responsible for climate change" (The Guardian, 2016).

In conclusion - I get to reduce my carbon footprint, eat knowing that the food I am eating has not contributed to unnecessary pain and an unfulfilled, miserable life and I get to feel much better than I ever have before. No more bloating and feeling spodgy. Personally, I feel like that is a win, win. And my bunnies love all the extra veggies in the fridge <3 

They love just watching they world go by. 

Resources used in this blog: 

http://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2010/jul/18/vegetarianism-save-planet-environment

I hate the gym.

Its a place solely for people to better themselves and become fitter and possibly even happier in the way they feel, the way they look. However there's seems to be a complete divide of species in the gym. The people that are there because they want to work hard through blood sweat and tears. And the people that have a membership so their social media page can scream I'm fit and healthy and they can buy overly prices bold coloured leggings that do nothing for the workout whatsoever but draw attention - one thing a lot of people in the gym do not want to do. I mean yeah they're pretty, but I do not have £30 of money to spare for something to be drenched in sweat. If you wanna shift that weight you better get your sweat on. 

I get so annoyed at the gym. Its like being in one of those high school america films. *Would you look at Karen Smith's gym clothes*. While I was at the gym one girl physically stripped down in front of everyone. Now I am torn between the feminist in me which believes power to women and wear what you want and the part of me that thinks its completely unnecessary in an air conditioned gym.  Like, come on. And whilst working out you're meant to keep your muscles warm so there really was no logic involved.

There's also the people that believe it necessary to stare at you. I'm on the treadmill looking like a fricking tomato and sweating like a pig... I do not want your face in my face, BITCH. (I am quoting a lot here).

And the girls who turn up with their hair and make up perfect... ITS THE GYM. Stop making the rest of us who care about make up seeping into our pores and don't give a crap about gym hair feel bad. 

UGH.

Yes, I wrote this after a work out. And no I will not apologise for this rant. 

So. Done.

I just want to take my water bottle and bop people right between their eyebrows with it. 

Fitness Diary: Getting Back into "It".

I, for the most part, have always had a very active lifestyle. When I was younger I was a cross-country runner, and in my teen years I was an Olympic and National Champion Cheerleader. However, now I am a graduate, and while this is one of my greatest achievements to date, I can see the many assignment deadlines and show weeks taking up lodgings on my stomach and thighs. 

This is a blog I have to approach with caution and maybe even some disclaimers. I in no way shape or form believe I am fat, or that I need to loose weight. I'm a size 8/10 on top and a 12 on the bottom, sizes I believe to be very healthy. I just simply want to be a bit less wobbly (ha.) and fitter. I think one thing I always forget about exercise is that actually - after the dread and actual struggle to get myself up off of my butt - I actually really enjoy it and love that "after exercise feeling". Its the initial getting motivated that I hate.Cause lets be honest - I'd rather be sitting on the sofa with a glass of wine, some hazelnut chocolate, a tub of Ben and Jerry's watching PPL on netflix. The kind of behavior that got me to this "i'm not as confident as I once was" state in the first place. I fricking love food. My god the amount I could eat at a  what ever you want all day buffet could put a body builder to shame. I pretty much eat what I want, when I want. 

I personally cannot diet. By this I mean cut out whole food groups or make myself eat less. Diets may work for some people amazing, but for me I just don't have that kind of willpower. and if I am entirely honest I don't believe they work long term. If you cut out a food group to loose weight, get to your goal weight and start eating normally again - you will put weight back on. It's inevitable. You're body also won't be used to breaking that food group down so you're likely to put on more weight quicker than you were before. Unless you make a life long commitment to a diet - I commend you if you have - the most effective way to loose weight will be to eat balanced and exercise regularly. 

SO, This blog isn't really coming to you at the start of my journey.. more 5% through. I think before you initially take that first step back into exercise, there are a few steps you have to tackle first. This may help anyone who is thinking of joining a gym, starting a few home workouts, or anything exercise related. 

1. Become comfortable with how your body is now. Know what you love and hate. That way you have a goal. 

2. Understand nothing will happen over night. You won't have the perfect workout or technique straight away.

4. Can you make the commitment? Don't waste money on a gym membership you do not intend to use.

5. Allow yourself to learn and discover. Everyone is different, what works for one person may not work for you. 

6. Remember - girls can lift and no you won't become like a man. The BIGGEST myth in gym history...do you know how long it takes for a man to look like "a man" by societies standards (far from my own may I just point out)... Years. If it happened over night for girls, men would be so pissed. 

7. EAT. Your body needs to repair itself. I'm talking carbs and protein being your best friend. 

8. Do not under any circumstances compare yourself. Everyone is at different parts in their journey. 

This blog, or new blog series, is for me. To keep track and motivate myself. I feel as if it's out here on the internet for people to read, I'll have something to work towards writing at the end of my day. I like that thought. This is not out there to educate people, as I am by no means an expert, I just want to blog about my experiences. I enjoy blogging, I enjoy exercising...so why not combine the two. And maybe my research will expand and soon I may be able to share my knowledge. 

I guess we'll see what happens. 

Becoming A Graduate Stress

**Disclaimer. I haven't blogged in such a long time, and I really miss it. So I ended up just going blahhhhh on to the page. Welcome to the inner workings of my mind. I'm sorry if it bores you, but sometimes you just need to write. Right? I couldn't work out if this was a blog to me, or to other undergraduates but either way I feel so much better now. I had no plan for my blog, this is literally just how my thought process went.**

University is an incredibly stressful and time consuming commitment. Pretty much for the three years you attend university, your brain will barely flicker on to something else before it returns with a crash to deadlines, the amount of work you have to do or should be doing, and your heavy social calender. You become an A* procrastinator, who by their dissertation realises "oh fuck, this is why you start in advance rather than the night before, I don't have enough time. Fuck, fuck, fuck. " You pull out some hair, eat lots of junk food, drink bottles of wine - because lets be honest none of your glasses are clean, and cry until grades are up and you breathe a sigh of relief. And for a split second you think you can relax.

Oh no my friend.

On a theatre course or any other art based course you will then have to stress about your final major project. Which will probably and hopefully have the same outcome as my dissertation. I'll stress ridiculous amounts, cry into some Ben and Jerry's and be thankful when it's all over...THEN be hit with major after show blues and wish I could do it all over again. Unless I fail... then I'd think fuck that. BUT that shouldn't happen. *cue nervous laughter and a quick move on*

Those previously mentioned after show blues made worse by the fact that in just under 2 months I am no longer going to be an undergraduate. As well as rewarding, that previous statement is completely terrifying. And any other postgraduates reading this will know how it feels. 

Being at university, you get a big dose of independence. Meaning that you want to move out and get on with your life as an adult with your freshly rewarded degree. Your planning may go something like this... Ok I'm going to move to London, get an amazing job, earn money and live a fantastic life.... with no money and a bundle of equally qualified unemployed competition. Yay. 

I'm making this sound really great aren't I?

God. It's scary.

AND, can I just ask, where the hell did these three years go?! It feels like a week ago I was gripping on to my banister at home begging not to go to university and now I'm here, about to graduate.... Sorry. What? 

Sending out applications does not ease the stress, nor does looking at places you can't afford, and looking at ways to fund further education that you may not get. 

I'm making this sound reeeaalllyy great, but in the sad scheme of things its the truth. Coming out of university is bleak...as fuck. 

BUT... you know what. Everything is going to be ok. 

When I graduate I'm only going to be 20 years old. My other half will only be 24. We are so so young, right? I have my whole life to live. And as much as graduating is stressful, there are some parts of it that are extremely exciting. 

A few examples... moving somewhere you actually want to live rather than the shit hole of a city your university is in. Starting something new and narrowing your career path to a certain profession with a Masters. Meeting new people. Experiencing new things.

And yes I am still waiting on a few acceptance or rejection letters and I don't know where I'm going to find myself next year  (possibly on the steps of my chosen university for a masters begging to let me have a place. They don't even need to give me a chair in the lecture room, I'll be happy in the floor.) BUT the first thing I'm doing when I graduate is travelling. And I've never been more excited. AND I'm turning 21! Which is just fabulous. 

So if you're going through the same issues and have no idea where your heading in life, remember so many people are in your position. Plan to do something you've always wanted to do and look forward to it. You deserve it! You went and got a bloody degree now its time to celebrate. And everything else?...No one has it all figured out, just remember that. 

Pick up your overly large glasses of wine and cheers with me to not knowing, and just going along with the ride. Because...why the hell not. 

Cheers.

xxx

My bucket list :)

This has been a long long time coming. But I'm glad I waited to do this as I think I finally have a better idea of the person I really am. I like to live in the moment and be spontaneous. I like to laugh out loud realllyyyy loudly, sing every second of the day and wear really bright colours. I don't really know what the future holds for me, and that's ok, because whatever it is I'm going to enjoy the hell out of it. Let's be honest, who really knows where they will be in 5 years time? If someone asks me when I'm all old and frail to look back on my life and describe it in one word I would like to say "happy". And I'd like to look back and recall my memories of all these events...
Some of these have been/ will be ticked off, just so you know I'm serious about doing all of these.

1. Go out in a torrential rain storm just to dance, laugh and get absolutely drenched.
2. Dye my hair purple. All over. Like "boom! that girl's hair is purple" purple
3. Paraglide (TICK)
4. Own an apartment with fresh flowers on my dresser, a dressing table with an ikea draw make up collection, and a walk-in closet, over looking a busy city or the sea
5. Perform on a London stage more times than I can count on my fingers
6. Start performing randomly in big cities all over the world. Spontaneous street performing.
7. See a broadway show (TICK)
8. Own a pair of Christian louboutins
9. Bungee jump
10. Cliff dive
11. Sky dive (hopefully going indoor sky diving for my 20th and taking the big real deal leap for my 21st :))
12. See the world. (My friend Sophie gave me the idea of getting a scratch off map to keep track of my travels)
13. Go to disney land Florida and wear a princess dress and Minnie Mouse ears ALL DAY.
14. See the northern lights
15. Walk the Great Wall of China
16. Write my name on the Berlin Wall
17. Take a road trip across America
18. See the stars and I mean really see them. Star gaze in a place where there are no artificial lights
19. Write a book. Maybe several.
20. Own A LOT of pets
21. Meet a tiger. In a zoo obviously.
22. Go to the airport with a packed bag and some money. Number all the flights leaving that day and ask someone to choose a number. Get on that flight and explore wherever I end up
23. See the big Christmas tree. You know the one I'm talking about. The one in home alone two ;)
24. Host a massive gatsby style party
25. Create my own theatre company

This is not everything I want to do, but I felt like it was a good start to my list. I'll update on each one I tick off. It will take me a long time but I'll enjoy every second of it. What's on your bucket list?

Lisa-Nicole xo

Breaking the Silence

Wow it has been so long since I blogged. Insanely long. I absolutely love blogging but with the stressful year I had at university it happened to take a back seat. But now with it being summer I cannot wait to start it up again properly. You see - with my blog before I always had really random posts with quite long intervals. But this time I would like to have regular blogs. So fingers crossed I keep to it. I want this blog to be more about what makes me happy. Whether that be my achievements, what I have been up to, or knowing me - what I spend hopeless amounts of money on. Yes, my spending problem continues to strive. Yay for my bank account -.-. So for my re opening blog post of this summer I decided to make a list off the top of my head of all the things that make me happy :).

- The colour yellow
- The warm fuzzy feeling you get from cuddles with someone very special
- Fluffy, cozy slippers
- The feeling you get coming out of the cinema after watching an awesome film
- Ticking things off my bucket lists http://instagram.com/p/qT2ACmHhbq/?modal=true
- Catching up with my friends
- Singing really badly and loudly in the shower pretty much everywhere I go
- Laughing till my stomach hurts
- Spending time with my family
- The Theatre - anywhere, anytime, watching anything. The stage just makes me so happy.
- Acting <3 words just cannot express. Performing will always be my first love.
- Comfortable silences
- Going to sleep in a busy area. I like background noise.
- Doing stupid things with my sister unintentionally. This happens more than you would think http://instagram.com/p/c6XhdLHhaf/?modal=true
- Reading a book you just can't put down
- Bubble baths
- Those second day hair, no make up days
- A song with really good lyrics
- Having a productive day
- The feeling after you finish a work out
- Puppies. Husky puppies
- Reminiscing. I love talking over old memories with my nearest and dearest http://instagram.com/p/nmDKmdHhXH/?modal=true
- Walking or running in refreshing rain
- Eating what I want - I get so much joy from this. Fuck the diets.
- Little heart felt surprises  http://instagram.com/p/p67NXTnhX0/?modal=true
- Being able to waste my time with someone special. If it makes you happy it's time well spent http://instagram.com/p/qSbzkbnhUp/?modal=true
- Learning something new
- Travelling - seeing the culture and beautiful scenery of somewhere new http://instagram.com/p/qT2Ur8nhcG/?modal=true
- Doing something for a good cause. It may sound stupid but the £3 I give to tigers every month makes me feel very happy as they are my favourite animal. And the fact I will be venturing out to Morrocco to help under privileged children just.... I can't even explain how excited and grateful I am to have such an amazing opportunity. To help and to experience. I may have reached my target but I will continue to fundraise :) https://mydonate.bt.com/fundraisers/lisanicolestevens
- Having interesting skills like stilt walking
- Acrobatics makes me so happy. It's so much fun.
- Bed. A lie in, an early night, I just love it
- A piece of work I've enjoyed doing to the best of my ability
- That just showered and moisturised feeling

- Cuddling with my teddies. Not ashamed at all

- Those days when you have nothing to do and have a duvet day 

- Sometimes I like watching "bad" TV. Made in Chelsea is a love. Must start watching gossip girl. 

- Doing my nails and make up. Sometimes getting ready is better than the night out 

- Those nights in with a bottle of wine and deep meaningful conversations 

- Getting tipsy with your course mates and talking to anyone and everyone 

- Having a girly clubbing night where dancing is the main priority

That's quite a list! Think I had better stop there but I would encourage everyone to do this! It made me feel really happy and I enjoyed writing it!

Think I might take on the 100 happy days challenge on Instagram. Hmm we'll see :). 

Lisa-Nicole xo 

Lent&AshWednesday

Hey Everyone! February ended with a bang as I went to Paris (blog to come soon) but alas March has started pretty damn sucky. I seem to have come down with a flu type thing that has made me take refuge in bed and only move to crawl to the toilet which is about five steps away. Booooo :(. Rest, fluids and paracetamol are my best friends at the moment. With being bed ridden I thought there was no better time to write a blog. Anyway with the month starting so crappy that means it can only get better right? 

So it has come to that time of year again where the Pancake Mix is a best seller and everyone decides what they will give up for lent. Lent begins tomorrow on Ash Wednesday and lasts for 40 days before Easter. However, this year I have decided rather than giving something up, I am going to take a few things up that will better me in some way or other. For some reason I just thought giving something up sounded rather negative. And nine times out of ten I never really stick to it. I usually give up chocolate, crisps, fizzy drinks and it just doesn't work, so I thought I'd change tactics. Down below are my ideas for this year's lent...

1. Take up Yoga. I have always wanted to try it and is meant to be awesome for fitness and flexibility.
2. Get more sleep. I struggle a lot with getting to bed early and getting enough sleep. To help with this i am going to set a bed alarm - like a morning alarm but rather than telling you to get up, it tells you to go to bed.
3. Eat Breakfast. This goes hand in hand with going to bed earlier. Get up so I have enough time to eat a healthy breakfast, after all breakfast is the most important meal of the day.
4. Start a savings account. To everyone who read my spending addiction blog at the end of summer, you will know how much of a challenge this will be for me. But I am determined to become better with money. So during lent I am going to put £5 every Saturday into my savings account. It doesn't sound like a lot but its a start.
5. Cook my own meals more. I have always wanted to get better at cooking, so I would like to cut down on how much I eat out. This will be healthier for me and will also help with saving money.
6. Blog more. I love blogging but I just don't do it enough. So during lent i am going to have a Wednesday and Sunday schedule, where I will blog every week. Heres hoping I stick to it!
7. Drink more water and take vitamins.With becoming so ill lately I think it's time to take a stand with my immune system. Keep hydrated and build my vitamin C back up.
8. Time for a crazy one... Pole dancing. I have always wanted to  take this up and a university near me has a society which I would like to join. Obviously this is not to become a gyrating woman on a pole, its more for the fitness benefits. Pole dancing is incredibly beneficial for flexibility and fitness and besides it looks well fun!

So there you have it :). Hope you all have had a better start to March then me and Good Luck with this years lent! <3